Why Can't A Woman Play Bridge Like A Man

Source: Unknown

Why can't you woman - play bridge like we do?

Our play is inspired - our bidding so true!

We're constantly willing - to educate you!

Why won't you just listen? - We haven't a clue!

One man in a million may overbid a bit.

Now and then he'll make a doubtful double.

Or perhaps he'll stretch a preempt just a whit.

But by and large his bidding keeps him out of trouble!

Why won't my partner - bid clearly like me?

My bids are so daring - so thrilling to see!

Precise and so lucid - you surely agree!

It's got to be her fault - when I'm doubled down three!

Why must a woman - play cards like a dame?

Men analyze quickly - the faults of her game!

We're kind and so gentle - to cover her shame!

Why can't a woman - admit she's to blame!

One man in a billion may raise his voice a tad.

Now and then he'll fail to thank the dummy.

At times he may reveal a face that's slightly sad.

But on the whole men who play bridge are rather chummy!

Why can't a woman - behave like a bloke?

She tells you to hush up - when you tell a good joke!

She says that you smell bad - when you go for a smoke!

Then calls the director - each time you revoke!

If I forgot to lead your suit, would you be cranky?
(Of course not!)

If I finessed you, would you pout and ballyhoo?
(Nonsense!)

If I trumped your trick would you pull out your hanky?
(Never!)

Why can't a woman - act like you!

Why are the ladies - so damn querulous?

Men play with such logic - no strain and no fuss!

With marvelous tactics - which we love to discuss!

Why can't you women - play like us !!!!